


Our Love Is Madness

by m_a_ioux



Category: My Chemical Romance
Genre: Gen, Imaginary Friends
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-07
Updated: 2017-08-07
Packaged: 2018-12-12 10:58:27
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,245
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11735643
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/m_a_ioux/pseuds/m_a_ioux
Summary: Mikey's always been Ray's best friend. Imaginary friend, that is. One day, Mikey disappears- and Ray never hears of him again... until more than ten years later. But it's not in the way he /wanted/ to hear of Mikey.





	1. 8 y/o

**Author's Note:**

> Just a silly thing I came up with a while ago.  
> Comments and opinions are appreciated.  
> All mistakes and errors are mine.  
> Title from Madness by Muse.
> 
> (first uploaded on my old account - j3tst4r - which is now deleted)

“Mikey, I’m home!”

Ray ran into his bedroom, setting his schoolbag down on his desk and looking around. He frowned once he didn’t see his friend immediately. “Mikey-?”

“I’m here!” he suddenly heard Mikey’s voice calling out, and turned around. Mikey was standing against the doorframe, grinning up at Ray. “Hi.”

Ray giggled and sat on the bed, Mikey walking over and sitting next to him. “How was school?” he asked Ray, smiling at him.

“It was okay,” Ray mumbled, shrugging a bit. He didn’t actually have friends at school- not that he minded. He always had Mikey once he was home again. Sometimes Mikey even came to him at school, in the bathrooms or during his lunch break. Other people never spoke to him, except from time to time to make fun of him in any way possible. Nothing bad actually happened today- which made it a good day in Ray’s eyes. “What did you do today?”

“I waited for you,” Mikey said with a smile, swinging his legs and shrugging. Ray giggled softly and looked up at Mikey. “You did? Sorry-sorry I took so long…” he said softly, to which Mikey shook his head. “that’s no problem. It’s not your fault, y’know?” he said, shooting Ray a reassuring smile. Ray hummed and nodded a little, though he couldn’t help but feel bad for making Mikey wait for him every day. “Still, I feel sor-”

“Who are you talking to, Ray?” he suddenly heard his mom calling from the doorway. He sat up and turned to her quickly, smiling. “To my friend, Mikey!” he said happily, pointing at Mikey. Ray’s mom frowned and tilted her head a bit, then just chuckled. “Of course, honey. Dinner will be ready in fifteen minutes or so, yeah?” she smiled. Ray looked up at her and nodded. “Alright! Can Mikey stay for dinner?” he asked. His mom hesitated a little, and frowned. “Uhh- well, I- sure, I guess,” she said, caught off guard by the question.

“Awesome, thanks, mom!” Ray said happily, turning to Mikey, while his mom walked downstairs again. “I hope you like spaghetti. My mom makes the best!” Mikey grinned at him and nodded. “I love spaghetti!”

Ray kept talking to Mikey for a while, before getting up once Ray’s mom called out again. “C’mon, dinner!” Ray said and ran to the door, motioning for Mikey to follow him. Mikey jumped up and followed Ray down the stairs, to the kitchen. “Mom, where’s Mikey’s plate?” Ray asked softly, frowning when he only saw one spare seat at the table- his seat.

“Mikey? Who’s Mikey?” Ray’s brother snorted between mouthfuls of food. Ray frowned and shuffled closer to Mikey. “T-This is my friend, Mikey,” he said quietly, looking at his friend who just kept his head down, staring at the floor. Ray’s brother just laughed at him. “There’s no one there, dumbass!”  
“Language!” their mom called out. “Ray, sit down and eat your dinner.”

“But mom-”

“Dinner, Ray.” She sighed. Ray turned to Mikey and frowned, not understanding why his mom and brother were acting so strange about him having a friend. Mikey shook his head and whispered, “I’ll wait in your room, see you after dinner.”

Ray hesitated but nodded a little. “s-see you, Mikey,” he said quietly, his brother snickering while Mikey walked to the stairs and up to Ray’s room without a single sound. “Don’t be rude to your brother,” Ray’s mom said. “Ray, sit down and eat.”

Ray frowned and slowly sat down at the table, keeping his head down. He took a bit of food and put it on his plate, eating it quickly- he really wanted to see Mikey again and apologize for his family acting like that. His mom had said Mikey could stay for dinner, so why wasn’t there a free seat? Why were she and Ray’s brother acting like that?

Ray quickly finished his plate and put it in the sink before running upstairs, to his room, to Mikey. He looked around his room, biting his lip nervously. “Mikey? Mikey, I’m back- don’t be angry… I’m sorry about what happened,” Ray said quietly, hoping Mikey hadn’t left yet.  
“Mikey, I’m sorry…”

“It’s okay,” Mikey’s voice suddenly came, and Ray turned around sharply. He smiled when he saw Mikey sitting on the bed, and quickly went to sit next to him. “I’m really sorry, Mikey, they’re usually really nice! And- and you’re my best friend, so I thought they’d like you, and-”

“It’s okay, Ray,” Mikey giggled, interrupting Ray’s rambling. “It’s fine. I know you like me, so that’s what counts for me,” he said, making Ray grin wide. “you’re my best friend.”

“You’re my best friend too, Mikey,” Ray said quietly, smiling up at him. “And I love hanging out with you.”

“I love hanging out with you too!” Mikey giggled, shifting closer to Ray. They both suddenly sat up with a gasp when they heard the door to the hallway open. “Ray, get ready for bed! You have school tomorrow!” Ray’s mom called out, making Ray pout a bit.

“Okay, mom,” he replied, standing up with a sigh. “I gotta change and get ready, Mikey, wait a second,” he murmured, Mikey nodding. “I’ll wait here.”

Ray smiled and grabbed his pyjamas, skipping off to the bathroom. He changed into them, brushed his teeth quickly, and walked back to his bedroom.

“I’m back, Mikey!” Ray called out, jumping onto his bed. Mikey appeared on the other side of the bed, smiling at Ray. “Good!”

Ray grinned and crawled underneath the covers, shifting to one side of the bed. “Lay with me? He whispered, blushing a little. Mikey chuckled and quickly walked over, laying down next to Ray. “You should go to sleep, Ray,” Mikey whispered when he noticed Ray trying to hide a yawn.

“But I want to talk to you,” he replied, pouting a bit, though he suddenly felt really sleepy. Mikey grinned a bit, shaking his head. “I’ll be here tomorrow, you know that,” he whispered. Ray closed his eyes and nodded slowly, yawning once again.

“goodnight, Mikey,” he whispered, and he swore he could feel Mikey brushing a tiny kiss over his forehead before he drifted off.

“Goodnight, Ray.”


	2. 12 y/o

"So yeah, like I said, James will come over to my place. We'll play video games and stuff. We were wondering if you wanted to join us?"

Ray glanced between his two new friends, Frank and James, a wide grin on his face. "Yeah, I'd love to!" He replied, nodding eagerly. This was the first time he actually made friends at school.

By now, Ray had realized people would think weird things of him when he talked about Mikey. He didn't understand why, but he told himself to just hide his friend. He wouldn't bring him up as the guy that was actually standing next to him, but more like an old friend he talks to occasionally. He knew Mikey would come with him, though Ray sorta hoped Mikey wouldn't talk to him too much. Not in a rude way, he just didn't want to mess up his new friendship already. They would just think he was talking to himself, though he was actually talking to Mikey.

"Ray...? Ray, you still there?" Frank laughed, waving his hands in front of Ray's face. Ray looked up with a gasp, nodding quickly. "Y-yeah! Sorry, I was thinking..." He mumbled, a blush rising to his cheeks. Frank grinned at him and nodded. "Okay, cool. So, we'll wait for you at these doors?" He asked, pointing at the school's exit. Ray nodded and smiled brightly, happy he actually made friends.

"See you later, then!" Frank called out before walking off with James. Ray waved at them before turning around, facing Mikey. "Ray, you're hanging out with friends??" Mikey asked, excited for Ray. Ray smiled wide, almost proudly. "Yeah! Their names are Frank and James, and we're gonna play video games! Will you come?" He asked immediately, and Mikey nodded. "Of course!"

After school, Ray ran to the building's exit as quickly as he could. He grinned when he saw Frank and James, running over to them. "Cmon, Mikey," he mumbled quietly, Mikey following right behind him.

"Hey, Ray!" Frank said once Ray got there. "Good, we're all here- lets go." They walked to Frank's house together, all fairly excited. Ray glanced at Mikey occasionally, who was walking behind him most of the time, and Mikey shot Ray a reassuring smile each time their eyes met. "It'll be awesome..." Mikey whispered, and Ray nodded a little.

Frank walked up to the front door and pushed it open, calling out, "mom, I'm home! Brought some friends!" Before kicking his shoes off and setting them by the stairs. James and Ray soon followed his example, setting their bags by their shoes. Mikey put his shoes down next to Ray's, before following the other three walking upstairs. Frank ran to his bedroom and jumped onto his bed, reaching over to turn the tv on. "I've got Mario Kart," he said while James and Ray sat on the bed as well. Mikey sat on the ground by the door, smiling up at Ray whenever Ray's gaze met Mikey's, reassuring him it would be okay. "You're good at that," Mikey whispered. Ray sat up sharply and gasped. "I love Mario Kart! My-my friend said I'm good at it." And hey, he wasn't lying.

"I'm totally gonna beat you, fro," James smirked as he took one of the controllers. Ray laughed a little and sat next to him. "We'll see..." He murmured while Frank set up a game for them. Mikey sat next to Ray and smirked a bit-Ray knew Mikey would help him. "Press start a bit earlier, you'll go faster. Go!"

"Go!" Ray repeated quietly to himself, and did whatever Mikey told him to do.

"Go to the right," Mikey continued.

"Right-"

"Take a sharp turn- /right/, Ray!"

"Right, right!" Ray groaned as he tried to keep on the track, squinting at the screen. He kept continuing the orders Mikey gave him- which helped him a lot, cause he /totally/ beat James at the first few races they did.

"Aw, dammit! You're good, Ray," James said with a playful pout. Ray giggled and handed his controller to Frank, who had been /dying/ to finally play. Frank took his place on the bed and Ray sat on the floor near the tv, watching the game. "Thanks, Mikey," he whispered when he thought the other two weren't paying attention.

"Who are you talking to?" Frank suddenly asked. Ray hadn't realized they already ended their last game.

"Uhh..." Ray bit his lip and looked at Mikey, a blush rising to his cheeks. "He's, like, m-my friend... Mikey..." Ray muttered, shrugging a bit. "He's... Nobody else can see him," he added in a whisper, keeping his head down. He was so sure the guys would laugh at him, and never want to hang out with him ever again.

Frank and James shot each other a questioning look, before they both gasped when they realized what Ray meant.

"You mean he's here, now?" Frank asked softly, turning the tv off and looking at Ray. Ray bit his lip and nodded hesitantly, staring at a spot on the floor in front of him. "Y-yeah," he choked out. "Don't-don't worry about it." The others just kept quiet.

"Ray..." Mikey started, shifting closer to his friend, but Ray just curled up into himself. "N-not now, Mikey, I-I'm sorry-" he whispered. Mikey nodded and got up, giving Ray a small smile to let him know it was okay, before disappearing.

"I-I should probably go home," Ray whispered, moving to stand up. Frank frowned and ran over to him quickly. "Hey- you can come again tomorrow, if you want. We loved hanging out with you," he said softly, and James nodded in agreement. "You know we don't mind, right?"

Ray nodded a little, but kept his head down. "I-I'll see you guys later..." He mumbled before stumbling out of Frank's room, quickly walking down the stairs. He pulled his shoes on and grabbed his bag, saying goodbye once more before stumbling out the door.

_.oO0Oo._

"Mikey- what if I messed up?"

Mikey sighed and sat on the side of Ray's bed. "You didn't. I'm sure they're fine with it."

Ray pulled a pillow to his chest, curling up around it.

"But- everyone thinks it's weird! Why wouldn't they? Oh no, what if they'll tell other people?? Mikes, I'm-"

"Ray, it's okay!" Mikey interrupted him, sitting right next to him. "Frank said you could come back tomorrow, I'm sure they still want to be friends. They like you."

Ray sighed, looking up at Mikey. "What if it happens again?" He whispered, frowning a bit. "I mean, everyone laughs at me for it. But you're my best friend, and I don't want people to make fun of it."

"If you worry too much about it, you could just- not mention it, I guess...?" Mikey said slowly, shrugging a bit. "Really- it's fine. /they/ don't mind, Ray."

"I-it's just so difficult," Ray whispered. "I want to talk to you, but to others, I'm talking to myself. Y'know?"

Mikey sighed, looking up at Ray. "I'll-I'll keep quiet. I don't want you upset like this," he said softly, smiling a little to let Ray know it was okay.

Ray nodded slowly, looking down. He knew it'd feel strange, not talking to Mikey the whole time. "Yeah, okay," Ray mumbled, getting up to change into his pajamas. "Just stay with me tonight?" He asked softly, and Mikey nodded. "Of course I will," he murmured, smiling at Ray.


	3. 16 y/o

"Yeah, it was my friend Frank's idea to come here."

The guy sitting next to Ray at the bar nodded at him with a smile. Ray glanced over his shoulder to see Frank and James going almost embarrassingly crazy on the dance floor. Ray laughed a bit and turned back around to face the guy- who had introduced himself as Ryan. Ryan was looking away, which gave Ray the opportunity to study him. He was tall, had dark hair, skinny. Ray sipped from his drink while thinking about his and Ryan's previous conversations- he knew Ryan was a funny, nice guy.

"Enjoying the view?"

Ryan laughed as Ray nearly choked on his drink. He hadn't realized he was staring, though Ryan obviously had.

"Sorry, uh...." Ray started, then just laughed it off, turning around to order another drink. "You want one?" He asked Ryan, trying to change the subject. Ray ordered two when Ryan replied by nodding eagerly. He'd lost count of how many drinks he had by now, but he didn't really care at the moment. He was talking to a cute guy, and Frank was near anyways.

He knew Mikey was, too.

_.oO0Oo._

The club's dance floor was a horny, drunk, sweaty mess by now, including Frank and James being their loud selves and thrashing around in the middle of the mass of people. At this moment, people were either making out or grinding on each other- as was Ray, who had been invited to dance by Ryan just a few songs earlier. Ray had his arms around Ryan's neck loosely, Ryan's hands on his waist, both swaying their hips along to the music. They were both a little drunk by now, constantly giggling and touching each other in any way possible, almost careless.

Ray stared up at Ryan, and the second Ryan turned his head to face Ray, he took his chance- he lightly pressed his lips to Ryan's, light enough to allow Ryan to pull away if he wanted, but just hard enough to give him the message everyone was trying to give to their partner- want. Ray grinned as Ryan kissed back almost immediately, tangling his hands in Ray's curls. They both giggled drunkenly into each other's mouths, their bodies pressed together as the kiss turned more heated- eventually becoming a make out session. There were hands everywhere, pulling at hair and clothes desperately. Ray let out a soft moan, which Ryan couldn't hear over the loud music, but could feel against his lips.

Ryan pulled away from Ray's lips, instead moving to kiss his cheek, all the way up to his ear. "Feel like going outside for some... Fresh air?" He murmured in Ray's ear, before lightly kissing its shell, which made Ray shudder.

"Y-yeah, uh, that sounds good..." Ray mumbled back, looking up at Ryan, who was grinning at him. "Let's go."

Ryan took Ray's hand and eagerly pulled him to the door, occasionally stopping for a few seconds to make out with him. Not like Ray was complaining. Ray took a deep breath when they finally got outside, the cold air making him feel dizzy. Ryan was still holding his hand, pulling him along. They eventually slipped into a dark alleyway, Ryan pressing Ray up against the brick wall and kissing him deeply, already pulling at his jeans. Ray let out a moan and eagerly returned the kiss, his hands tangled in Ryan's hair, tugging lightly. Ryan started kissing his neck and pressed one of his thighs against the bulge in Ray's jeans, making him choke out a tiny, squeaky moan. Ryan smirked, unbuttoning Ray's jeans. He quickly licked the palm of his own hand before sneaking it into Ray's boxers, gripping his base and making Ray moan against Ryan's lips. Ryan started moving his hand up and down slowly, leaning in to kiss and nibble on Ray's neck. Ray groaned and tugged Ryan's hair, pulling him closer, while thrusting his hips up. "Oh my- oh my god," he gasped, his eyes and mouth wide open.

What Ray didn't expect, though, was Mikey suddenly appearing close to them- /way/ too close for Ray's liking. "Shit- bad timing," Mikey simply mumbled.

"Not now, Mikey," Ray hissed, not noticing he said it out loud until he realized Ryan had stopped moving his hand, leaving him panting. "Who... Who is Mikey?" Ryan asked, looking up at Ray with a frown.

Ray just laughed nervously, shaking his head. "Sorry, I- long story. Just ignore it," he mumbled, which seemed to work- Ryan started slowly jerking Ray off again, and Ray let his head fall back against the wall with a satisfied sigh.

"Hey Ray, do you think we-"

"Not now, Mikey!" Ray repeated, though this time, Ryan fully pulled away. "What the fuck, man?"

"Listen, I- please don't worry about it," Ray tried, even though he knew it wouldn't make a difference.

"What kind of asshole do you have to be to talk about somebody else while doing- /this/?" Ryan scoffed, staring at Ray, clearly unamused. Ray looked down, trying to think of a reply, but nonetheless- Ryan just walked out of the alleyway with no other words, leaving Ray standing against the wall with his jeans halfway down his thighs.

Ray let out a frustrated groan, his head falling back against the wall. "Are you fucking kidding me, Mikey?" He sighed, pulling his jeans back up while Mikey slowly walked over to him, picking at his fingers nervously. "I'm- I'm sorry, Ray, I-" he started, but Ray waved it off.

"Seriously- this is the second time that's happened. Do you not realize that this isn't the time??"

Mikey flinched at Ray's loud voice, frowning and looking down quickly. "I'm sorry, Ray, but I can't fucking help it!" He tried. Ray sighed and shook his head, mumbling something about not letting it happen again, before walking back to the club to try and find Frank and James.

Instead of walking along with Ray, Mikey turned away, then disappeared.


	4. 21 y/o

"Next confession- I never believed the 'ooh, three AM talks with your partner are so amazing!' Shit, but hey, here we are!"

Ray laughed, turning onto his side to face his now long-term girlfriend. "Seriously? Well- I always liked the idea of it, honestly," he replied, "but then again, anything with you is just amazing."

Christa laughed, rolling her eyes. "You're cheesy and absolutely hopeless. But I love it." Ray grinned, pecking her lips before pulling the covers up higher and snuggling closer to her. "I know I am," he murmured, lightly pressing their foreheads together. They were laying in bed in their shared apartment, surrounded by pillows and blankets, the room dimly lit by small colored fairy lights on the wall. One of Ray's hands was lightly stroking up and down Christa's back, underneath her shirt- they both for some reason loved skin-to-skin contact- while Christa's hand was lightly playing with Ray's curls.

"Your turn," she murmured, pressing a kiss to Ray's nose. Ray sighed and chewed on his lip, trying to think of anything. He frowned when he thought of the most obvious thing, and wondered why he hadn't mentioned that before.

"I had like, uh... An- an imaginary friend," Ray muttered, not looking up at Christa, kind of afraid she'd laugh at him or something. "Oh, really?" Was all she said, kissing Ray's forehead. "What were they like?"

Ray hummed softly to himself, frowning- it had been ages since he thought of Mikey. It felt weird doing it now. "Well," he started slowly, "his name was Mikey. I think he was there since I was like, I don't know, six? Seven?" Ray shrugged lightly. "And, uh- well, I didn't have friends as a kid. So... So that's probably why he was there. That was also probably the reason why he was with me for so long."

Christa kept quiet for a while, before asking the question Ray was already fearing to hear. "How long?"

Ray let out a sigh, blushing faintly. "I-I think the last time was like, when I was sixteen, maybe seventeen. So really, way too long. But you have to know, throughout my whole life, I've only had two close friends- these two friends, and Mikey." Christa nodded, stroking Ray's hair and kissing his forehead, encouraging him to continue.

"The thing is, he-he basically grew up with me, as ridiculous as that sounds," Ray started again. "For a long while, he was basically all I had. I always saw him as the same age as me... Maybe a little younger? Yeah, he was younger, but smarter, basically. Wiser."

Ray just kept talking and talking to Christa about Mikey, he had no idea how long. But it had been ages- he had to let it all go. She kinda deserved to know that, anyways. Yet, what confused him the most was the fact that even after he finished his whole story, Christa had not laughed at him or called him ridiculous. Not even once. They just kept on talking and talking, about their childhoods, their friends, so many things. After a few hours or so, Ray was so tired he didn't even remember all the things he'd said up till now- he even thought he might've cried at some point. Or points. What he /did/ remember was- Christa didn't make fun of him. No matter how embarrassing his story was, she'd talk about it, she'd understand it.

"We should go to sleep," Christa whispered after she'd caught Ray yawning for the hundredth time so far. Ray made a little noise of complaint, but just cuddled closer to Christa and closed his eyes, drifting off almost immediately.

He loved Mikey, yes. He was close with Mikey and felt safe with him, yes. But Mikey could never hold him or kiss him, not like this- it was Christa who made him realize how much he wanted that, how much he /needed/ that.


	5. 28 y/o

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The last chapter of this story.  
> I had a lot of fun writing this, and I know not many people have read this yet and I doubt people will actually start reading this, but I hope you liked it anyways!

"I love you, you know?"

The simple sentence made Christa look up from making dinner, smiling wide at Ray. "I love you too, baby."

Ray smiled brightly, leaning back into the couch. The TV was on, but he wasn't really paying attention to it- too busy thinking. Thinking about how his life probably couldn't get any more perfect. He and the gorgeous woman he was lucky enough to call his /wife/ since a couple of years, bought an actual house. So much better than a tiny apartment. They'd been living here for a few years, and Ray hadn't regretted a single second of it. The house was pretty big: a large, beautiful garden, where Christa could take care of the many, colorful flowers she'd always wanted to have. Ray even had his own music studio now, where he could go any time of the day, doing what he loved to do. There was an extra playroom for- their son. Ray smiled at the thought- he still couldn't believe they actually had a little child, of their own.

As if he could read Ray's mind, the little boy came running into the living room. "Daddy!" He exclaimed the second he saw Ray sitting on the couch. Ray chuckled and stood, picking him up and twisting around, before setting him down again. "Hey little man! What's up?"

The little kid looked up at his dad, a wide grin on his face. "I made a friend!"

Ray tilted his head, raising his eyebrows curiously. "Oh, you did?? That's amazing!" He said, kissing his son's forehead, who was nodding eagerly. "Did you meet him at school?"

Ray frowned a little when the boy shook his head, and Ray's smile completely dropped when he pointed at a seemingly empty spot on the floor.

"His name is Mikey!"


End file.
